THE heartbroken mother of missing Northside teen Amy Fitzpatrick has relived the agonising days when her world was torn apart in a new book.
‘Please Find My Amy’, by Audrey Fitzpatrick, is the story of how a mother refuses to give up on her daughter.
The disappearance of a child is every parent’s worst nightmare and it plunged Audrey into a living hell that continues to this day.
Amy went missing in 2008 at the age of 15 on New Year’s Day in Riviera del Sol in Mijas Costa.
The Coolock teenager’s disappearance made the headlines both here and in Spain where her family campaigned and searched relentlessly in the hope of finding her.
“All we have left of Amy are our precious memories and a determination that we will keep on going, keep on fighting for her, until we know what happened to my Amylou,” Audrey stated.
In the book, Audrey gives a heart-wrenching account of when she realised that her daughter had vanished without a trace.
“I was trying to stay calm,” Audrey stated.
“So many thoughts battled each other in my head. One second I was thinking ‘oh s**t, something is after happening to her’.
“Then an instant later I was thinking: ‘no she’s just doing usual thing. I am going to kill her when she comes home’.
“The possibility of her disappearing can’t happen – it just doesn’t come into your head. I wouldn’t let it into my head. It had to be something else – anything but the worst scenario. You don’t want that in your head.
“I think you just go into autopilot and you are just thinking: ‘no, no, no, it can’t happen’. You think that she has gone off with a fella, or has fallen and broken her leg and is lying somewhere. You don’t – can’t - think that she has been taken.”
Audrey and her partner Dave Mahon moved back to the Northside earlier this year after going through four years of mental torment.
They were devastated to leave Spain, where they are convinced Amy still is, “dead or alive”.
The campaign to find Amy has cost Audrey and her partner Dave all they had financially and more. The stress and worry has taken its toll on their physical and mental health.
On one occasion Audrey’s heart stopped and only the nearby presence, by chance, of a doctor prevented her from dying.
In the book, Audrey recalls her last phone conversation with Amy who had been staying over at a friend’s house.
“The last time I saw her she was in great form,” Audrey stated.
“And she was in great humour in the last phone conversation we had on New Year’s morning when Dave and I were in Harmon’s Bar.
“There wasn’t a row. There wasn’t anything about her not cleaning her room, for example. She was just very relaxed.”
Despite her worst fears, Audrey still hopes and dreams that her daughter will come home.
“Four years later it’s just a continuous, living, breathing, nightmare,” she states in the book.
“Every second you are hoping that she will turn up and say hello.”
‘Please Find My Amy’, by Audrey Fitzpatrick, is published by Paperweight Publications. It’s now on sale in bookshops at e12.99.